The last month has not been a good month for me. The last 3 weeks have been nothing but a test to my patience. A stomach bug, followed by an epidemic of the flu that took out my whole family, pushed me to the brink of cracking. However, I am lucky, in a way, that I kept my attitude 100% positive during that time.
I had just started to gain the momentum I needed to start to make. Difference with my family. I had 4 windows of activity (2 lunchtime & 2 evening), and I took advantage of 3. My results were not great, but I at least started. Then this plague hit me, and took ALL the wind out if my sails.
Now, could I have done more these last couple of days/weeks. Of course I could. However one of the paths of self improvement means that I can identify the weaknesses in me and work on them. Some people say a man does not express myself, and should carry on. However a bigger man has to look in the mirror, and say "this was a mistake, and how do I change it?"
Lessons Learned
-Preventive care is better than antibiotics.
-Even when out of the game, keep yourself in the game, by reading, or listening to cd's etc.
-Listen to advice when it is given.
-Open up to the people who can give you advice.
So that's all I have for tonight. Things are starting to look up.
Monday, 25 February 2013
Thursday, 21 February 2013
In sickness and in health.
I'll never understand how some people have the ability to just carry on during an illness. This last week the entire family (wife and kids that is) and I were diagnosed with the flu. Not the dreaded Man Flu, a disease so strong that only men contract it, but the actual flu.
Needless to say the rest of the planned week did not go ahead as expected. In fact today was the first day I went back to my job. I have looked upon things in the last week and it has given me an idea about where I would like to head from here. Budget planning, and goal dreaming have kept my mind busy. While in the past I have been timid to move forward in things, it's also handy for me to know where I am, which I did not know until this evening.
So now I sit on the edge of (another) weak month. Bt this time it's not as bad as before. I have been more proactive this month than I have been in a long time. I have worked harder and studied more in the last 28 days than I have in the last 6 months. Have I lost what little momentum I have had in the last week?
Actually no. While I only had a little momentum, I did not feel sorry for myself, and accepted the cards that were dealt to me in this situation. By this time Saturday night, I should be fighting fit, where only my mind can stop me. Nothing else. The plan on me shutting my mind up, is to fly on instinct. 9 years ago I flew on pure instinct and fear. Today I fly on pure thinking and safety. As I mentioned before I need a healthy dose of both.
But for now, I am happy to have seen me keep my spirits up, and that alone may be the most important thing I can do on this journey.
Needless to say the rest of the planned week did not go ahead as expected. In fact today was the first day I went back to my job. I have looked upon things in the last week and it has given me an idea about where I would like to head from here. Budget planning, and goal dreaming have kept my mind busy. While in the past I have been timid to move forward in things, it's also handy for me to know where I am, which I did not know until this evening.
So now I sit on the edge of (another) weak month. Bt this time it's not as bad as before. I have been more proactive this month than I have been in a long time. I have worked harder and studied more in the last 28 days than I have in the last 6 months. Have I lost what little momentum I have had in the last week?
Actually no. While I only had a little momentum, I did not feel sorry for myself, and accepted the cards that were dealt to me in this situation. By this time Saturday night, I should be fighting fit, where only my mind can stop me. Nothing else. The plan on me shutting my mind up, is to fly on instinct. 9 years ago I flew on pure instinct and fear. Today I fly on pure thinking and safety. As I mentioned before I need a healthy dose of both.
But for now, I am happy to have seen me keep my spirits up, and that alone may be the most important thing I can do on this journey.
Sunday, 17 February 2013
Goal breakdown #1 - Become a better person.
The above title seems a little vague when it comes down to it. What do I mean by becoming a better person? I am not a bad person by any stretch of the imagination, but I do have timid ness in my personality. That is something that has been there in the past, but I have been known to take major risks if needed.
August 29th 2004 is a great example. I was 20 years old. With nothing more than 2 guitars, a suitcase full of clothes, and £100 cash, I left my whole life behind me, and moved to the states. It was during that time that my playing safe mentality happened. I had to watch the line, and for 6 years, I fought the immigration system, and now sit where I am today.
Which is why I have to change. You see I still have a lot of e traits I had when was a 20 year old boy with no responsibilities. I am now a 29 year old man with a family, and a whole lot of responsibilities. Simply put I have to take care of my family.
Here is where the irony comes into things.
One of the areas I have to change, is to get my sense of adventure back. You see the me of today would not leave behind all I know and start a new life elsewhere. Nt just because of the family, but I would probably over-think what had to be done then I would not do it.
I need to start melding the responsible side of me (no laughing at the back please), and combine it with the mindset of the kid. I need to do what is rig for my family, not with caution, and trying to be correct 100% of the time, but to be able to get out there and make mistakes, and just be someone who risks things.
By this time next year, I sill have that personality as to where I have never met a stranger, as well as the drive of competitiveness on which I have lacked in recent years. I will have a much improved attitude as well as confidence to do the right thing and not question a single decision that I make.
This is not an overnight process. Right now I am reading "Attitude 101" by John Maxwell*. A very good read, and is giving me some insight into a mindset of mine that is changing.
While I am learning to change my attitude, I have also got to move forward. A new lesson learned for me. It's not going to be perfect all the time. If I wait till my attitude is in check, I will never make it towns my goals.
So for to it I will leave people with a couple of affirmations.
-I deserve to be successful.
-I choose a path of self growth.
-I am courageous when it comes to adversity.
(Due to the limitations of the iPad app for blogger, I was not able to attach a link to the mentioned book. If you are interested in "Attitude 101- John Maxwell" you can get it on the iTunes Store, and directly at the link here - https://www.johnmaxwell.com/store/products/Attitude-101.html)
August 29th 2004 is a great example. I was 20 years old. With nothing more than 2 guitars, a suitcase full of clothes, and £100 cash, I left my whole life behind me, and moved to the states. It was during that time that my playing safe mentality happened. I had to watch the line, and for 6 years, I fought the immigration system, and now sit where I am today.
Which is why I have to change. You see I still have a lot of e traits I had when was a 20 year old boy with no responsibilities. I am now a 29 year old man with a family, and a whole lot of responsibilities. Simply put I have to take care of my family.
Here is where the irony comes into things.
One of the areas I have to change, is to get my sense of adventure back. You see the me of today would not leave behind all I know and start a new life elsewhere. Nt just because of the family, but I would probably over-think what had to be done then I would not do it.
I need to start melding the responsible side of me (no laughing at the back please), and combine it with the mindset of the kid. I need to do what is rig for my family, not with caution, and trying to be correct 100% of the time, but to be able to get out there and make mistakes, and just be someone who risks things.
By this time next year, I sill have that personality as to where I have never met a stranger, as well as the drive of competitiveness on which I have lacked in recent years. I will have a much improved attitude as well as confidence to do the right thing and not question a single decision that I make.
This is not an overnight process. Right now I am reading "Attitude 101" by John Maxwell*. A very good read, and is giving me some insight into a mindset of mine that is changing.
While I am learning to change my attitude, I have also got to move forward. A new lesson learned for me. It's not going to be perfect all the time. If I wait till my attitude is in check, I will never make it towns my goals.
So for to it I will leave people with a couple of affirmations.
-I deserve to be successful.
-I choose a path of self growth.
-I am courageous when it comes to adversity.
(Due to the limitations of the iPad app for blogger, I was not able to attach a link to the mentioned book. If you are interested in "Attitude 101- John Maxwell" you can get it on the iTunes Store, and directly at the link here - https://www.johnmaxwell.com/store/products/Attitude-101.html)
Thursday, 14 February 2013
A return to the "Blogosphere" for someone who thinks too much.
Hello world. It's a very strange feeling to be getting all of my thoughts back online. I guess I should give you an indication as to who I am, and why I will be typing on these pages, and where did the last blog I have go?
About 2 years ago I started keeping my thoughts on this blog. I true John fashion, I decided to start a blog at perhaps the hardest times in my life. My, hero in life, and a man who I loved and respected, passed away after years of battling illness. He was a good man my Grandad was. At that time I started writing some pathetic ramblings, all of which have been consigned to the recycle bin at google.
Today, a mere 20 months on from that, life has changed, and I have changed. No longer a little punk, with a "Why always me?" Attitude, but one that has changed into something that has surprised myself. So what will you expect should you happen to read these pages...
-Life. My life, my family's life. I will do my best to stay out of both religion and politics, as i personally believe that [Political party] are doing a [great/bad/horrible/amazing/shoddy] job, and if you ask me the [president/prime minister/king/queen/chancellor/tribe leader] is the most [amazing/worst/average/good/bad/corrupt] person who has ever been leader! Meaning I try not to look at that crap. Also my personal savior is just that. I don't care about yours, you don't care about mine, so lets leave it be. By aside from that, just some general thoughts and musings if you will.
-Football. And by football I mean the sport you play with your feet, not the combination of armor chess/rugby that most of the people I live near call football. If talking about The Arsenal, Swansea, and how I see the state of the English/Welsh game is, then please read on.
-My affirmations. I strongly believe that you should always keep a positive outlook in ALL areas of your life. I have few people in life I would call a mentor. However when they all say to be positive and have powerful affirmations, then I will give them positive affirmations.
-My journey. I am at a point in my life where it's now or never in terms of being what I want to be. I am 29 years old, and have had many years takeaway from me, with my immigration battle, and with just not seeing life that people my age saw in the 6 years I was a mental prisoner. Am I complaining? Of course not, those 6 years shaped me into a better person. Bt I want to document every step of my journey, from where I am, to where I would like to get to, and to she I see myself as a 30 year old man.
It's a journey, so please enjoy my thoughts.
About 2 years ago I started keeping my thoughts on this blog. I true John fashion, I decided to start a blog at perhaps the hardest times in my life. My, hero in life, and a man who I loved and respected, passed away after years of battling illness. He was a good man my Grandad was. At that time I started writing some pathetic ramblings, all of which have been consigned to the recycle bin at google.
Today, a mere 20 months on from that, life has changed, and I have changed. No longer a little punk, with a "Why always me?" Attitude, but one that has changed into something that has surprised myself. So what will you expect should you happen to read these pages...
-Life. My life, my family's life. I will do my best to stay out of both religion and politics, as i personally believe that [Political party] are doing a [great/bad/horrible/amazing/shoddy] job, and if you ask me the [president/prime minister/king/queen/chancellor/tribe leader] is the most [amazing/worst/average/good/bad/corrupt] person who has ever been leader! Meaning I try not to look at that crap. Also my personal savior is just that. I don't care about yours, you don't care about mine, so lets leave it be. By aside from that, just some general thoughts and musings if you will.
-Football. And by football I mean the sport you play with your feet, not the combination of armor chess/rugby that most of the people I live near call football. If talking about The Arsenal, Swansea, and how I see the state of the English/Welsh game is, then please read on.
-My affirmations. I strongly believe that you should always keep a positive outlook in ALL areas of your life. I have few people in life I would call a mentor. However when they all say to be positive and have powerful affirmations, then I will give them positive affirmations.
-My journey. I am at a point in my life where it's now or never in terms of being what I want to be. I am 29 years old, and have had many years takeaway from me, with my immigration battle, and with just not seeing life that people my age saw in the 6 years I was a mental prisoner. Am I complaining? Of course not, those 6 years shaped me into a better person. Bt I want to document every step of my journey, from where I am, to where I would like to get to, and to she I see myself as a 30 year old man.
It's a journey, so please enjoy my thoughts.
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