The last month has been a bit of a noodle scratcher if I am honest with myself. Remember I started this blog to hold myself to accountability. This however is something out of my shaking hands.
As most people know I am epileptic. Not a big deal if for the last 10 years you have just tried your best to get on with it. However, the last 4 weeks I have been getting more headaches, more dizziness, and more general symptoms. My worst fear was confirmed not 2 weeks ago, when for the first time since July, I suffered a seizure. Again not a big deal. Some things, admittedly, will have to be put on the back burner for now, but other things have taken a sharp decline.
Aside from my first one, this seizure has been the big one. It's one has thrown me through the biggest loop I have ever been in. 2 weeks to the day, and I am still having dizzy spells, times of being totally incoherent, and for the first time ever, I have been a shaking wreck. It's really noticeable in my. Right hand and arm. When I sit down for long periods of time (Like at work for example) I start to rock in place. Not the up and down rock of a weeping child, but, for lack of a term, a man dancing around on a chair, while sitting.
This has put a damper on some plans for this weekend. It has also left me worried about what is going on. I know that for now, I am going to have to put up with things. But I will end on this.
So far this year, I have been sick, or have sabotaged myself. The ironic thing is that I was feeling totally confident about my chances of succeeding. I still do. I fact I am sure more than ever, that this is the right path I am on. I just have to be physically up to it. 2 months ago, I was mentally done. Now I am mentally up for it as it were. I find out this week how to handle the physical side. Then no more lip service. Just do it...
(Apologies for any typos. It's hard to type with your typing finger shaking at eat keystroke.)
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